My life is endlessly glamourous. I get to go where I want, hang out with who I want, and be authentically me wherever I go. Isn’t it fabulous? Well, not for you of course. Your only joy is you get to watch me do all of these amazing things from behind a computer screen. The only way you get to participate in my luxurious life is by buying my clips and sending me your money. All the while you’re just so jealous of the life I lead. That doesn’t stop you from jerking, of course. So I think I’ll just rub it in your face one more time.

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